Mindset Hacks for Summer Stress Relief

Mindset Hacks for Summer Stress Relief

Today we’re going to talk about Mindset Hacks for Summer Stress Relief and how to not let it affect you so much.  Here’s the truth – it’s summer, it’s hot and some people’s tempers flare at this time of year.  There may even be some jealousy creeping in that others have time off and we don’t and it doesn’t seem fair.  Life is moving along at faster pace than it ever has before.  THERE ARE REASONS WE HAVE STRESS!  It’s how we COPE with the stress and defuse it that matters most.

To watch my video click the image below:

Mind Hack #1: When you feel stress, start controlling your self-talk. Too much stress for too long leads to depression.  When you find yourself saying, “I’m so stressed out”, “This is so tiring”, “This is so exhausting”, “I cannot do this all”, “This is not fair” you’re going to get even MORE stressed out!

It’s time to change your self-talk. You need to start to realize that you’re not a victim.  You have volunteered for some of this stress, so UN-volunteer from some of it. Life doesn’t have to be perfect.  It never has been and never will be.

Some Declarations that are helpful are:

  • I am now calm and cool under all circumstances.
  • I am in control of my life; I now can let go and relax; I am in control of all my thoughts and actions;  I am very effective and efficient in stressful situations.
  • I love and honor myself; I have a positive attitude that I can handle myself in all situations.

Mind Hack #2: Remember that EXPECTATIONS ARE THE SOURCE OF ALL SUFFERING!  If you’ve planned an event, launched a new product or service, hired new staff – then you already know things don’t happen exactly the way you want them or expect them to.  That’s just part of life.  The key is to prepare yourself and expect that there will be hiccups, problems, and challenges every day and then your stress goes down because you know those things are going to happen.  That’s a REALISTIC point-of-view.

The key is to change your thinking to be solution-oriented when challenges arise.  Say to yourself, “We will FIND the SOLUTION!”

Mind/Body Hack #3: Another way to gain control over stress is to simply breathe deeply several times.  When your heart is beating too fast because of your anxious feelings, controlled breathing slows your heart and allows you to feel in control again.  Breathing is also an effective form of muscle relaxation.

Yoga and Meditation are fabulous remedies for a lot of stress.  They help you focus on your breathing.  This is a great thing because remember, your mind cannot focus on more than one thing at a time.  When you’re focused on your breath – you aren’t focusing on the chaos happening around you.  This allows you to start to relax.

Mind Hack #4: It’s super-important to love yourself enough to learn the SKILL OF AWARENESS about what stresses you out and what you can do about it.  One thing you can do is have self-imposed “pattern interrupts”.   When you’re stressed out is not the time to make decisions.  Take a few minutes to take a walk, listen to some relaxing music, play with your pet and kids for a few minutes. If you can’t do those then try to get to a place you can be alone. Imagine yourself in your favorite place or a quiet, peaceful location such as in a forest, on the top of a mountain or by the waterfront — a mental Shangri-la.  Not only is this an excellent Pattern interrupt but this type of imagery allows you to focus on something beautiful and emotionally rewarding.  The University of Delaware has done studies proving that imagining a quiet natural scene in your mind will significantly reduce your stress.

Mind Hack #5: to help you with becoming aware of what stresses you out try these:

What can I do today to get away from the world and just take care of myself?

What can I do to have a good day today in spite of reality?

What resources can I use today to get back to my normal positive thinking self?

What friends can I share my problems with that will be a support system?

What self-talk can I start to use now to change my state of mind?

What areas of my life have I allowed myself to be a victim?  What do I want to do differently in the future?

In what areas of my life do I demand that I be perfect?

In what areas of my life am I out of balance?

What activities am I trying to be all things to all people?

What parts of my life am I stuffing my feelings and not venting frustrations?

How can I not take myself so seriously?

One year from today, what will be funny about this situation or my behavior?

WHAT AM I GOING TO DO TO SUPPORT MYSELF?

Mind Hack #5: Give yourself permission to have some positive personal rewards, to appreciate yourself such as: a massage; pampering yourself with a good meal (with dessert); a night out on the town; a hot bubble bath and a glass of champagne; playing Golf or tennis; phoning someone you love to give you a lift; a cleaning service to clean your home.  Anything that empowers you to feel like you are special!  Always keep in mind that bad days don’t last.  This too shall pass.  Empower yourself not to let your state of mind control you — you always control your emotions with your thoughts.

Personally, my staff and I have been working very hard on my upcoming launch for Vision Quest Virginia Beach that’s happening October 5 – 6, 2017 and we all have decided on personal rewards that we will allow ourselves to have once everything settles down.  We aren’t going allow ourselves to get so stressed out that our relationships are harmed, that we don’t take care of our bodies and get sick or that we lose touch with our community.  We’re all looking forward to our own positive personal reward.

Love yourself A LOT more folks! Don’t take life so seriously, no one here gets out alive!
Remember to PACE yourself and remember there’s always a solution to every challenge or problem you face.

Top 10 Hacks to Get You 100% RESPECT

Top 10 Hacks to Get You 100% RESPECT

Today I want to talk with you about how your earn R.E.S.P.E.C.T. in life.  These 10 hacks don’t require any particular talent but boy, do they create massive amounts of respect for you in this world.

——–>>click on Image Below to Watch my Newest Video <<——-

Being on Time. This actually means showing up 5 minutes EARLY.  Being early gives you time to get yourself put together and settled at your destination before your meeting.

Work Ethic. Make sure what you turn in and what you give to people is beautiful, correct, easy to read, easy to understand and that you’re doing what is necessary to impress people with your work ethic.

Show Effort. Dress up for the occasion. You all know that we make our first impression in the first 33 seconds of meeting someone. In that time, we decide how old you are, what you do for a living, and should I respect you?  So, you want to show effort in being on time, how you present yourself and your work ethic.

Positive Body Language. Create and maintain eye-contact with people. Show that you are really present with them in this moment. Make sure you are looking at them – not at your phone to show that you are not distracted by other things.  You want your body language to show that you care about them and what they are saying.  It’s very important not to slouch and act like you are bored.

Positive Energy & Passion. Make sure that what you say is positive.

Attitude (If there is a problem, there is a solution.) Your attitude determines whether you’re part of the problem or part of the solution. Don’t be a whiner or complainer. Be FOR things not always AGAINST them.

Being Coachable. Be willing to read books, listen to CDs & DVDs, and attend seminars and retreats to continue learning and growing as a person.  Show that you are really into growth and expanding yourself.

Doing extra. This is different for each person but it’s showing up and doing something a little extra, above-and-beyond what is expected.

Being prepared. Do Your Research.  I just had a new coaching client that a company sent over to me yesterday for an hour and a half appointment and she had no clue who I was or why she was sent to me! I would NEVER hire this person.  In fact, if anyone comes to me and doesn’t know anything about me because they didn’t go to milteer.com to find out who I am, I won’t hire them.They aren’t prepared. They know nothing about me and cannot tailor their presentation or discussion.
If you are going to meet important people, look them up on Google. Do some research on them and find something positive about them to talk about so that they know you’ve gone and done a little extra research.

Showing Gratitude & Appreciation. The reason I say that is because the world is so full of an entitlement mentality.  You know, the people that think they deserve everything with no effort or gratitude. It is such a good thing to show people appreciation and gratitude. Tell them that what they’ve done in your life is valued and appreciated.  Get out a card and handwrite a thank you note.  We receive so many texts and emails every day that they don’t hold as much value as writing a handwritten, mailed card does.

These 10 hacks can help you earn respect and people will want to do business with you.

Feel free to pass on this article to people that could use this information!

Until next time,

Is Your Focus Like a Shotgun or Laser Beam?

Is Your Focus Like a Shotgun or Laser Beam?

Let me ask you a question……Where are you out of integrity with your own goals? That means – where have you put other people ahead of your own goals? Where are you flaking out and not following up? Where are you procrastinating? Where are you really AFRAID to go for it?

<<<<———–Click on the image below to watch the video ————–>>>>

The reason I want to talk about this topic this week is that everything is made up of momentum and energy and it’s based on the amount of ENERGY and FOCUS that you have. Do you have a shotgun focus that is just spreading around or do you have laser beam focus about what you want?  I will honestly tell you that one of the reasons I have become successful in life is that I have this very determined, persistent focus. The old joke is not to get between me and my goals. I am very focused and very laser beam. I do not dilute my energy in other places when I want something.

To really succeed in today’s world and to be massively successful, to break all of your bad habits, to really focus your energy in ways that allow you to achieve what you want to in life – you must put your blinders on about what other people are doing. Years ago I spoke with Marlo Thomas (Danny Thomas’ daughter. He was very famous actor years ago.) on stage and he gave her some great advice that has really stuck with me, which was to “put on your blinders in life and run your own race.” That is what I want to impart to you today.

Remember, this is YOUR race and YOUR life. Just because other people do it other ways doesn’t mean that you have to copy them or emulate them. It’s nice to learn from other people but your soul has its own calling and it may not align with any other soul’s calling. It doesn’t make any difference. Your life is your life! Where are you out of integrity with getting what you want? Where are you playing small, just allowing life to pass you by? Are you under the impression something is just going to magically happen in life to save you?

I’m here to remind you that YOU are the savior in your own life. That’s right, nobody else but you. Most people cannot seem to get that. They secretly hope that someone will “discover” them and then suddenly life will be miraculously shifted and changed. Here is the truth…YOU have to discover YOU. You are the star, director, and editor of your own life! You have to give yourself permission to go after what you want in life. Now, does that mean that going after what you want is hard sometimes? Absolutely! But you just need to take a deep breath and put one foot in front of the other. Sometimes small steps create great careers!

Every day – take your attention away from the unnecessary. The insane news that does nothing but cause distress for everyone. Put it aside. Other people’s problems that are not your problems. Put them aside. How you have made mistakes in the past. Forgive yourself and put them aside.

Your job every day is to wake up in the morning and have a new perspective on your life. You will have new information and new knowledge. Every day is a new opportunity, no matter how many times things have been messed up in the past, today could be that day where everything comes together. You’ve got to be ENTHUSIASTIC and EXCITED about life! You have got to LOVE YOURSELF that you focus your energy 100% on what you want to achieve!

You need to be open-minded, curious, and excited about gaining new knowledge. Learn to give yourself a break. Do the right thing for yourself every day. Use your critical thinking skills to discern what would be the highest activity that you could work on right now that would be a profitable, long-term good play for yourself?
It really is a matter of awareness and what you are telling yourself. If you’re telling yourself, “No matter what I do, it’s never going to work. I don’t seem to get a break. Life is not fair. Everybody else is successful, but not me” – you’re doomed! All inspiration has to come from within yourself. Other people can inspire you but you’re the one who has to put on the boots, go out in the yard and do the work.

Your point of power in this lifetime is this second in time. It’s not next week, next month or next year. It is RIGHT NOW! So love yourself and do things TODAY that will change the course of your reality. Be PROACTIVE.

A serious bad habit is waiting for life to happen to you. Your job is to chart the way. ACT and you will see that there is nothing on earth holding you back but YOU.  One way to figure out and clarify your dreams and aspirations in life is to join me in Virginia Beach, VA (my hometown) for my next Vision Quest Retreat October 5-6, 2017.  Sign up to be the first to receive the latest information here.

Magic, Love & Light,

Focus on Harnessing Your OWN Energy

Focus on Harnessing Your OWN Energy

Today I want to talk about something that is absolutely crucial for every human being on earth and that is to harness your own energy better than you have been doing up to this point.

Your daily habits literally determine how successful you are in your life.

<——Click Image Below to Watch Video—–>

How you honor your own boundaries, end your own bad habits, and how you create success and profit in your life all determine the degree of success you have in life.

We all have Five Types of Energy – which are your life currency and they are mental, physical, emotional, spiritual and financial.  We each only have so much energy each and every day.  When we aim those energies towards fixing other people’s problems, when they haven’t asked for your help – we are depleting ourselves of the energies we need to have a successful life of our own.  It is out of integrity to help someone who hasn’t asked for your help!  If someone ASKS you for help – that’s a different story.  But, you have to ask yourself how much of your own limited energy are you using every single day to fix other people’s problems who aren’t grateful, don’t listen to your advice, don’t appreciate the information you are sharing with them and who merrily go on their own way ignoring your advice – which frustrates you.

New plan!   The best habit you can have every single day is to TRUST that most people have the ability to figure things out for themselves if you give them that opportunity.

So, if you have adult children and you’re fixing their problems every single day – you’re teaching them to come to YOU to fix their problems. If you have staff in your business that you are constantly fixing all of their problems – you aren’t giving them the chance to learn the skills.  When they learn these skills – that’s what builds true self-confidence.

Food for thought:  If people have problems and you take on their problems as your own because you think it’s just easier to fix their problems than focus on your own issues – Unless you are getting paid as a coach, you are out of integrity with yourself.   Your job in life is to have your own goal and aspirations in life and to use your life energies towards making those dreams happen.  When you take on other people’s issues as your own – you are wasting your life energy and end up depleted, with no energy left to work on your own growth.  Stop trying to fix everyone around you and focus on yourself.

Habit Busting Tip: I want you to break the habit of AUTOMATICALLY trying to fix everyone’s problems unless you’re getting paid as a life coach to do so.  What I want you to start doing is remain NEUTRAL.  When someone comes to you with a problem remain neutral and supportive. Just say to them, “I know you can figure this out.  I know you’ll find the right references and resources to help you figure this out.”  Let them be.  Let them learn to figure things out on their own.  It is not your job to fix everybody on earth.  It’s your job to fix YOURSELF!

On a regular basis, if I have staff come to me with an issue, I have them come to me with three solutions that they’ve taken the time to come up with on their own.  Sometimes those solutions work and sometimes they don’t, but that isn’t the point. The key is that they are learning to think and come up with their own solutions before coming to me.  They are learning to not rely on me to come up with solutions.  Your kids and friends need that from you, too!

So, your job is to enforce your boundaries, to create good habits of supporting people.  Tell them (if they ask) they are smart, offer books to read, suggest things to do to be productive in figuring out their challenges.  It is NOT your job to dig in, forget your own life, forget your own schedule, or forget your own boundaries and to get so emotionally involved in other people’s problems that you’re trying to fix them for them.  That is NOT YOUR JOB!  Unless you are a life coach and you’re getting paid – it is NOT YOUR JOB!

You were born to take care of YOURSELF.   Give yourself permission to truly focus your energy on achieving your goals, your dreams, and your aspirations.  I promise you, you will not only be more productive – you’ll feel so much happier in life when you give up the responsibility of being all things to all people.

Your job is to love and nurture your own life and to be an EXAMPLE to others.  You don’t have to fix their life for them – you can simply be an example.

Magic, Love & Light,

 

 

P.S.  I am holding my next Vision Quest in my hometown of Virginia Beach, Virginia October 5-6, 2017.
If you’re interested in finding out more – go to www.visionquestvabeach.com!